healing

To Love Like Judge

Image Dr. Jessica MaricevicLeave a comment

It’s taken me time to write this—maybe because putting it into words means admitting he’s really gone. But grief has a strange way of nudging us forward—through moments of kindness, memory, and unexpected connection.

You see, the other day I received a friendly question from a local gas station attendant. His question opened the door to this reflection, reminding me that Judge’s presence didn’t just change my life—it left a mark on others, too.

I stopped for gas, and the attendant—always kind and jovial—leaned ever so slightly in through the window with a warm smile.

“Where’s your big dog friend?” he asked, looking toward the back seat as if Judge might be curled up, ready to pop his head up—as was the norm.

I felt the weight of the words before I even spoke. But I said them. The attendant’s face shifted—genuine heartbreak in his expression. He wanted to know what happened to my friend, so I told him.

I thanked him for remembering Judge, for asking, for seeing us. He gave me a fist pump, “I’ll be thinking of you.”

The gas station attendant’s words and supportive fist-pump immediately brought me back to a warm summer evening walk a few seasons ago. An older gentleman on his evening stroll passed us and paused, his eyes soft with admiration. “Magnificent,” he said, nodding. “Simply magnificent.”

At the time, I thought he was talking about Judge, and he was, because Judge was magnificent—“magical,” to quote my son. But today, I wonder if the neighborly observation was referring to us—our bond, our rhythm, the strength in how we moved together, how we communicated.

There was something sacred in my connection with Judge, something that didn’t need to be explained—only admired for the authentic love it displayed. It was beautiful.

Intersectionality of Time and Space

The comment at the gas station isn’t so different from the one that summer day. Both came from strangers who saw something beautiful in our everyday. Both moments remind me that Judge’s legacy isn’t just the love he gave me—it’s the way he made people stop and feel something.

People gravitated toward him. Kids, neighbors, delivery drivers, the mailman who kept treats in his pocket just for Judge—they all felt it.

I’ve come to realize that people didn’t just see a beautiful dog when Judge was around—they felt something in his presence. There was a gentleness about him, a knowing. He carried himself with quiet confidence, never asking for attention but always drawing it.

It wasn’t just that he was loyal or smart or handsome or protective, though he was all of those things. It was the way he made people feel seen, safe, and loved—without needing words. He had that rare gift.

Love Like Judge

You know, whenever I posted a picture of Judge to Instagram, it was usually accompanied by the #mustlovejudge hashtag—a playful twist on the early 2000s rom-com Must Love Dogs. It became my unspoken rule, the standard for who I let into my life, into our life: “Must Love Judge.” If you didn’t get Judge or love him, you probably didn’t get me—or love me—either (not to mention our entire pack). Now, after losing him, I see that phrase a little differently.

It’s not enough to have loved Judge. The real challenge, the real calling, is to love like Judge—offering the same quiet comfort walking with people through joy and sorrow, listening without needing to speak, being loyal, steady, and present.

I once heard that grief is just love that has nowhere to go. I’m not sure I’ll ever be over the loss of Judge—and honestly, I don’t think I want to be. But my everlasting love for Judge does have somewhere to go.

The way forward is to carry what he taught me into every space I enter and meet the world with the same unwavering heart and the same quiet grace. This is Judgie’s Yoda-like life lesson I know he wants me to carry forward, reminding me to hold steadfast to my ability to love unconditionally, to always remember that I am deserving of that same unconditional love from the universe, and to encourage others to do the same.

So I choose love—the kind that asks for nothing but gives everything. The kind that lingers, even after goodbye.

I choose to love like Judge.

I want to take a moment to thank everyone who has been so incredibly supportive and kind throughout Judge’s battle—and through everything since. Your calls, texts, DMs, beautiful flowers, cards, handmade drawings, thoughtful gifts, hugs, and check-ins have lifted us all in ways I can’t fully put into words.

Every gesture, no matter how big or small, has been a testament to the love you had for Judge—and for us.

My wish for you is simple but sincere:

May everyone in this world be lucky enough to experience a love like Judge in their lifetime.

And may we all honor that gift by paying it forward—simply by loving like Judge.

Thank you for standing with my pack. Thank you for loving us through our heartbreaking loss.

We love you,

Jess, Jacob, Daisy, Bravo, & Bud

✌️🫶🐾

The Honorable Judge

September 10, 2017 – March 25, 2025

The Privilege of a Second Chance

Image Dr. Jessica MaricevicLeave a comment
Reunited with Judge • February 16th, 2025

I was given two options: immediate surgery or I needed to say goodbye. The surgery wasn’t guaranteed, the risks were high, and there was no promise of a miracle. But when I looked into Judge’s eyes, I knew it wasn’t time for us to part.

You see, his eyes told me everything—full of life, determination, and an unbreakable spirit that’s always defined him. And in those eyes, I saw a Rolodex of memories and moments in which Judge never gave up on me. Not once. Through every high and low, he’s been there, my constant, my protector, my best friend. How could I possibly give up on him now?

The doctors were honest. They told me the risks, the during and post-operative possibilities. But they also told me Judge was strong with an excellent heart—minus a bum spleen, Judge was a relatively healthy German Shepherd. It was all I needed to hear.

But making that choice was a privilege.

Emergency surgery isn’t just a matter of love and loyalty—it’s a matter of resources. It requires financial stability, access to specialized care, and the ability to take time away from life’s other responsibilities to be fully present for recovery. Not everyone has that choice. For many, the cost of life-saving surgery for a pet is simply out of reach. For others, the lack of nearby medical facilities or the inability to take time off work becomes the deciding factor.

When I stood at that crossroads, I was painfully aware of this privilege. I had a support system that rallied around me, offering love, prayers, and help with life’s other demands. I had access to my own veterinarian, the Veterinary Emergency Group, and Cornell’s exceptional veterinary team which carried out the life saving surgery. Without any one of those things, the outcome could have been heartbreakingly different.

This awareness weighed heavily on me because I know so many people face the same gut-wrenching decision without the resources to choose hope. I was able to fight for Judge because I had the privilege to do so. But others have to make the hardest choice of all—not because they don’t love their pets just as fiercely, but because life’s realities leave them no other option.

Judge isn’t just a dog. He’s my family, my guardian, my heart. He’s watched over my son, protected our home, and shown me a love so pure it’s changed me for the better. He is the reason why I started my entire dissertation over and focused on the adolescent-animal bond in secondary settings. In Judge, I saw the power of connection, the depth of loyalty, and the healing power that only a dog’s love can bring. His impact on my life was profound enough to shape my career, my research, and my purpose.

Today, the doctors are hopeful. Even with three liters of blood in his abdomen, the surgery was clean, a successful splenectomy, and Judge is home healing. He’s eating like the picky king of the castle that he is, back to reigning over his Mötley crew, his spirit as unbreakable as ever. Watching Judge return to himself, sneaking back to his spot on the couch, seeing that familiar spark in his eyes cataloging another memory together—it’s nothing short of a miracle.

Judge’s road to recovery won’t be easy, but he’s here, alive, because he never gave up and because I had the privilege to fight for him—just as he’s always fought for me. But for those who aren’t given that choice, my heart aches.

I will never take for granted the opportunity I had to fight for Judge and will advocate for solutions to ensure all pet parents can make balanced choices for the well-being of their furry family member—without having to choose between love and necessity. It’s my hope that one day, every pet parent will have the freedom to choose what’s best for their pet, without limitations.

I want to sincerely thank the veterinary teams at White Plains Animal Hospital, Veterinary Emergency Group of White Plains, and Cornell University Veterinary Specialists of Stamford. Your expertise, compassion, and dedication have meant everything to our family and Judge. You’ve given us more than just a second chance—you’ve given us hope. I am forever grateful for all you’ve done to give us back our Judgie Boy.

Harmonizing Tails: My Unsuspecting Connection with Peter Frampton

Image Dr. Jessica MaricevicLeave a comment

Recently, I enjoyed an exciting post by fellow dog lover, Rocker Dog Podcast, teasing his most recent interview with the legendary singer Peter Frampton. I was elated to learn Frampton shares a deep affection for German Shepherds, just like me. As a dog enthusiast, this connection sparked my interest, but it is a particular image shared by Rocker Dog Podcast that transports me to the past and strikes a chord with a classic tune.

The picture in question features a young Peter Frampton alongside his faithful companion, Rocky.

And immediately I started singing, one of Frampton’s iconic songs, “Show Me the Way.”

The connection between Frampton and his German Shepherd, Rocky, seems to echo the sentiment many have towards dogs and their unique way of showing their people a path in life.

For me, such a connection with dogs goes beyond mere companionship; it’s a source of inspiration and guidance. As a proud owner of a German Shepherd, my Judgie Boy, I know firsthand how these intelligent and loyal animals illuminate the way forward. German Shepherds, like many dogs, demonstrate unwavering loyalty, boundless love, an intuitive understanding, and often act as a guiding light through life’s twists and turns (at least that’s what my Judgie, and all my dogs, have done for me).

Frampton’s photograph with Rocky displays a beautiful symbiosis between a musician and his canine confidant. It makes me reflect on how our dogs become more than just pets; they become our mentors, teaching us about loyalty, resilience, and the joy of living in the present moment.

“Show Me the Way,” a song that touches the hearts of many, now takes on a new layer of meaning for me. It becomes a melody of gratitude for the four-legged friends who, much like Peter Frampton’s Rocky, show me the way in life’s journey.

As Rocker Dog Podcast’s interview with Frampton unfolds, it brings to light the current chapter of Frampton’s canine companionship. The legendary singer shares heartwarming details about his present dog, a Labradoodle— his service dog, Bigsby.

Labradoodles are known for their intelligence and hypoallergenic qualities, and as a service dog highlights a different dimension of the bond between humans and their furry friends. The Labradoodle’s unique combination of friendliness and intelligence aligns seamlessly with Frampton’s lifestyle, showcasing how dogs adapt to their owners’ needs, providing comfort and practical aid. Bigsby is still undergoing training to provide assistance and support to Frampton, and Frampton is very much a part of this training.

During the podcast, Frampton delves into how Bigsby has become an integral part of his daily routine, offering not only companionship but also essential assistance. The revelation about Bigsby adds a contemporary touch to Frampton’s journey with canine companions. It emphasizes the evolving nature of our relationships with dogs, from the iconic Rocky to the modern-day support and friendship provided by Bigsby. It also sheds light on the broader role that dogs play in our lives, not only as loving companions but also as dedicated service animals, enhancing the quality of life for their human counterparts and exemplifies the incredible versatility that dogs bring into our lives.

As a dog lover, hearing about Peter Frampton’s experiences with Bigsby resonates with me. It reinforces the idea that, regardless of fame or status, the connection between humans and dogs transcends boundaries. The Labradoodle’s role as a service dog further underscores the incredible impact dogs can have on our well-being, providing assistance, comfort, and unwavering loyalty.

In the end, Rocker Dog Podcast’s post and interview not only celebrates the enduring love for German Shepherds but also showcases the evolving dynamics of the relationship between Frampton and his canine companions. Bigsby, the Labradoodle service dog, stands as a testament to the adaptability and versatility of our four-legged friends, reminding us of the myriad ways in which dogs continue to enrich and contribute to our lives.

The Key to UC Davis Health’s CARE Project: The Canine Companion

Image Dr. Jessica MaricevicLeave a comment

The Impact of Therapy Dogs in the Healthcare Setting

“The newest canine CARE team dog, Landon, is popular not only with patients, but with employees, who enjoy seeing him on the job” (Houser, 2024).

I recently read a social media post by Canine Companions in which the organization highlighted therapy dog Landon and his involvement in the UC Davis Health’s CARE (Creativity, Amenities, Relaxation, Exploration) Project. UC Davis Health takes great pride in the CARE Project, with a focus on treating the whole patient: mind, body, and spirit, its mission goes beyond conventional medical approaches, and recognizes the therapeutic power of what may at first seem to be unconventional—the human-animal bond.

In a healthcare environment, where stress and anxiety can be overwhelming, the introduction of therapy dogs like Landon serves as a beacon of hope and motivation. The partnership between UC Davis Health, Landon and his volunteer handler, Pat Tull, exemplifies the profound impact animals can have on the well-being of individuals facing health challenges. You see, Landon’s supportive role to patients and staff alike, not only highlights the significance of certified therapy dogs but also emphasizes the compassion and comfort they bring to those undergoing hospitalization, and those delivering the medical care.

The CARE Project and UC Davis Health’s commitment to the human-animal bond contributes to patients’ emotional well-being and encourages their active engagement in treatment, which fosters a holistic approach to healthcare. Katie Lorain, the creative arts and recreation therapy manager of the CARE Project, observes patients moved to tears upon encountering a therapy dog, which underscores the transformative nature of these interactions. Lorain’s observations of the patient-therapy dog relationship in the health care setting serves as a testament to the unique and invaluable role that animals can play in enhancing the human experience, especially in challenging circumstances.

The emotional response of patients, often moved to tears at the mere sight of these canine companions, speaks volumes about the profound connection forged in these moments. Let the story of therapy dog Landon and UC Davis Health’s CARE Project remind readers of the healing power embedded in the simplicity of a wagging tail and a comforting presence. Let Landon, and his fellow pawesome therapy dogs, reinforce the idea that, sometimes, love at first sight can come in the form of a furry friend bringing solace and security during moments of vulnerability.

To learn more about Landon and UC Davis Health’s CARE Project, please read Nick Houser’s January 2024 piece, Introducing UC Davis Health’s newest four-legged team member, Landon.

Shoulda. Woulda. Coulda.

Image Dr. Jessica MaricevicLeave a comment
My original creation; a digital design to welcome Instagram viewers to visit this blog post. My inspiration for this graphic stems from my love of the ocean, Montauk, and of course, dogs | J. Maricevic, 2023.

I recently read a funny meme. It was something along the lines of, “there are some people who should never have met my dog.” That might even be the exact wording, but I’m not quite sure.

I thought it was a funny post. I even considered reposting it. I thought about being cute and crossing out “dog” and replacing it with “dogs” (because I have four), or changing it to something like, “there are just some people who will never meet my dog, or dogs,” or maybe even, “there are just some people who will never meet my dog, or dogs, again,” because, well…

Listen, I know there are some people who simply do not deserve to be around any living creature due to their decision to treat an innocent being inhumanely. Let me be very clear on that point. Any unkind or abusive treatment is an obvious red flag, a scarlet letter forever emblazoned on a person’s chest, and that’s right, that person will never, ever be around your dogs, or my dogs, nor should they be around any other dogs or innocent beings.

So yes, there is at least one possible exception to the should never meet my dogs scenario. But was the concept behind the post, while produced in jest, further perpetuating negative thinking, energy and creating disharmony?

And then I got to thinking…

Why would there even be a person, or people, in an individual’s life who should never have met a person’s dog, or dogs, or never have the chance to meet a person’s dog in the future, or never have the opportunity to see them again? Yup, that’s a rhetorical question. You and I both have our own answers to our whys.

In normal Jess-fashion, I contemplated, reflected, and personalized the thought to better empathize with a person who holds such strong sentiments, and even take a moment to better empathize with myself.

I reverted back to when I was able to tangibly embrace my passion (that’s 4 years old). Talk about a lot of years, and a lot of memories, and a lot of “stuff” to sift through. Memories, moments, and faces– the flickers of my mental time capsule, going at Mach speed.  And with each face, memory, and moment, there were a few, not many, which did include people who, for all intents and purposes, were/are tied up in that silly little meme I referenced at the beginning of my post.

[Enter Thinking]

Ironically enough, the people who, in theory, should never have met my dogs, are the very people who, at the time, probably needed to meet my dogs the most. There are probably people I have yet to meet, who need to meet my dogs. There might even be people who have met my dogs, who really do need to meet them again. I am not quite sure how I feel about coming to such a realization. We fear the unknown right? Or is it that we fear the known?

My original creation; a mock-meme which I like to call, Probably the Ones who Needed to Meet them the Most. This image appears in my most recent instagram post | J. Maricevic, 2023.

A Transformative Impression

Dogs have a unique way of touching lives and teaching valuable lessons through their ability to bring joy, companionship, and help others become more patient, empathic, and responsible (Maricevic, 2022). Meeting another person’s dog can be a transformative experience for some individuals, even if they have had limited exposure to dogs or pets in general. It’s also possible that emotional competency development can happen without directly interacting with a person’s dog (Maricevic, 2022). It can also happen for a person who observes others interact with their furry family member.

Yes, that means when one person is able to witness (1) how another interacts with a dog, (2) how one person can love another being other than themselves or (3) a demonstration of reciprocal and unconditional love in return, those observations alone have the potential to leave a positive impression on a person’s psyche (Maricevic, 2022). Not just any impression, a transformative impression; an impression for the better.

Interacting either directly or indirectly with a dog can model what it looks and feels like to give and receive unconditional love, how to develop trust, embrace responsibilities, and the importance of living in the present moment (Maricevic, 2022). Such observations can also provide an opportunity for empathic growth, as others learn to understand the needs and behaviors of the do, in turn strengthens a person’s ability to develop and form bonds over time with humans and dogs (Maricevic, 2022).

Let’s not forget, dogs are known to have a positive impact on mental health, reducing stress and anxiety. For people who may be struggling emotionally or socially, a dog could provide a source of comfort, support, and a means for connecting with others during moments when feeling isolated, or even ostracized from the world. Dogs serve as a bridge for connectivity, helping to establish, solidify, and even mend relationships.

Got Hope?

At first thought, there might be people who come to mind who should never have met a person’s dog, or never will get the chance to meet a person’s dog, or those who will never have the chance to meet a person’s dog again. Now, minus the aforementioned exception, I challenge that initial thinking. In fact, I propose those should never or will never statements, shift to maybe one day statements.

If one is to change from a never mindset, to a maybe mindset, does that potentiality provide more space for positive thoughts, and less negativity? Does a change from a never mindset, to a maybe mindset create a space for an unexpected connection, a misunderstanding understood, a missed connection redirected, or serendipitous happenstance?

Admittedly, a change in mindset may never bring a moment to reality, and even if it does present itself, the moment might be fleeting or the opportunity anticlimactic. Those maybes may never happen at all. Even so, if there exists an opportunity for personal growth and positive experiences, and that opportunity starts within the individual themselves through self-empowerment and self-actualization, and there is no harm being done to oneself physically or emotionally, no harm being done to another person physically or emotionally, and no harm done to any person’s dog or dogs, then perhaps it’s worthwhile in the long run?

Perhaps, at least start with a shift in mindset. Perhaps be open to the maybe?

Maybe, one day [fill in the blank}.

Easier said than done, you say?

Maybe.

But I figure, on this rainy summer’s day, it’s worth a try. Chalk it up to needing some Vitamin D, being over all this rain, or an exercise in strength conditioning…. ’tis the season to bulk up the mental and emotional fortitude needed for the time when the radiant rays of sunshine give way to crisp fall days.

No shouldas, wouldas, couldas.

I got hope.

I’m going to give it a try.